It's Been A While

I knew it had been some time since my last post, but WOW, over a month! In some aspects, time has gone by at a break-neck pace. In others, let's say professionally, they have not.

I am typing alongside a nice glass of 12 year old Glenlivet, trying not to overanalyze the latest afternoon phone call, detailing the company's interest in other candidates. Although this role had no certain future beyond the contract, which is to be up in November, it still held promise of responsibility. Personally, I think the worst aspect of being unemployed is the lack of responsibility that one has. Granted there are a lot of emotions tied to this state of limbo, especially if one's responsibilities include a family, mortgage, etc. But, fortunate for me, it's just me. In this time of uncertainty, I have found the experience humbling, and in a lot of ways, very similar to A LOT of unsuccessful first dates. I have also found my mind wandering into other areas of interest, that I could potentially turn into a career.

Last night I cooked for a couple people that are close to me. I had grilled center-cut lamb chops with a marinade I threw together, topped with a balsamic cranberry reduction. As I jokingly said last night, I had to pat myself on the back for that one. Fantastic. The point of this 180 degree turn in topic, is due to the current mental crises I am having. I have been offered an opportunity to become a chef apprentice at a restaurant and design the new, not currently offered, lunch menu. Anyone who knows me, knows two things: I can cook, and I have wanted to open a restaurant for a long time. This opportunity seems to satisfy what I want, right? Well, then there's the money issue. Of course I will be paid, just not much. There are other concerns also, but the fact the opportunity is there has to account for something, right? The flip to this is staying on my current path, trying to find a marketing role, and seeing where that road takes me.

At first, the dream of realizing your true passion is easy to suppress due to thoughts of unpreparedness, current level of comfort, or financial concerns. But when you are constantly being told no, in an industry that's supposed to be your big boy role, and yes in your dream role, what are you supposed to do? Is it a sign, or have I just not found the perfect position yet? Time will tell, but I will say, the word "no" gets harder to hear each time.